A Little Reflection, A Little Rebellion

Baby Violet and Nikki are upstairs sleeping, Dylan is sleeping, the girls are over at grandma’s house. So I’m in the basement at my desk reflecting on the past week and catching up on some “me” time. I’m playing a bit of guitar, working on a bit of calligraphy, talking to my pet fish, all the normal stuff people do when they’re alone. As I sit here, I’m having a few thoughts that I’d like to share.

As I hope most people know by now (given the dozens and dozens of pictures posted to facebook, Instagram, twitter, and everywhere else) Nikki had our fourth baby. Violet Lucille Proxmire. It is a very happy time for us, and yet a tad bittersweet at the same time. We’ve decided that four is where we will stop, and we are taking measures to ensure (as best as we can) that it is indeed our last baby.

 To be quite honest, it is almost all sweet as far as I’m concerned, and only slightly bitter, but Nikki is a bit sad to think that we won’t be having any more babies. My thoughts on the matter are, here we are, we’re done making our family. Now we get to enjoy raising it. It’s a whole new chapter of life, moving on from the “making” to the “shaping.” And to think, we have had all of our children before the age of 30. (in times like these I get to claim my wife’s age as well). Making our family has occupied much of our time in the past handful of years. Women know, there is a good year and a half from before the baby is born to well after, that you have time for very little more than meeting that baby’s needs. We’ve done it 4 times now. We are ready to move on and try to do more.

In other news, I made a website. Well, my tech support guy Greg made a website. I just do the admin stuff, check the email, and write stuff on it. When I can’t figure out how to do something, I message Greg. I paid the 8 bucks for the domain name though.  It’s still pretty new, and since my wife just had a baby, I haven’t worked on it much in the past week. It is a project at the fore front of my “stuff to do” list. It’s at www.staywed4life.com. I’m tossing around the idea of making it an open forum to get other people involved in posting entries and all that business. I won’t get into it much here, just go check out the website and read the 3 pages at the top that describe what it is about. Poke around and read some of the entries there. I’ll post new stuff on facebook, twitter, and Instagram as it comes.

 Oh, and by the way, the intent of this website is not to attack divorce, or people who have been divorced. I don’t know your circumstances or what you’ve been through, and I don’t mean to offend anyone with mission of this website, I only mean to encourage couples who are in a good place stay in a good place. I have many friends who are in their second marriage, they are serving God, and they solemnly believe that they are where they are meant to be. I wish to encourage them, and I invite them to encourage other as well.  

Also today, my preacher touched on a subject in his sermon that I had a strong opinion on until now. I’m assuming this happens to everyone once in a while. You hold an opinion about something, then later through a subtle nudge by the holy-spirit you discover that God actually speaks on the matter and what He says is different than what you say. If you are a believer and a Christ follower like I am, that means you have to make an adjustment because He isn’t going to.

I know that sort of thinking is contrary to popular thought today. I’m in the process of putting together a separate entry solely dedicated to discussing this one subject, but for now I will only skim the surface. It’s the idea that the Bible is timeless. Its teachings are just as relevant to us today as they were to those living in the span of time that the bible was being written. I hear and see posts of people who otherwise claim to be Christians saying things like, “Some of the things in the bible don’t apply to us today. Things are different today than they were back then.” I have a handful of things I’d like to say in response to those comments, particularly when made by self-professing Christians. I’ll save most of them for when I’ve worked out a way to be a bit more edifying with my responses. For now I’ll stick to just saying, believe it or not, the bible was written with you in mind.

 It isn’t less valuable to us just because a couple thousand years have passed. In fact, it is believed that it took roughly 1600 years to write the Bible, and the gap from the Old Testament to the New Testament is over 400 years.  It wasn’t written for one particular period in time is my point. Much of what we get from the Bible are core values, principles, and rules to live by, which do not (I hope for everyone) change just because the world changes. We have new technology, new tools, new benefits, and new problems. But we can maintain our integrity all the same.

Anyway, I went off on a bit of a tangent there. The point I was making is that I’ve held on to this idea that anyone can call themselves a Christian in today’s world. It’s so loosely defined that it can really mean anything. As my preacher says, “It’s often the default check box.” I grew to dislike the word, to dislike hearing people use it without clarifying what it means. I wanted a different word, a different title. Something that says, “No, I don’t fall into the 85% of the population who claim to be Christians but whose actions, beliefs, and sources for beliefs leave you wondering.” But, “Christian” is the name we were given, and I just have to deal with the fact that all those who call themselves “Christians” don’t even agree on what it means. It’s a shame really that we don’t agree. I hear that the number 1 reason people don’t become Christians is because they see how Christians act.

I know I have no authority to define the word “Christian,” but just to clear this up and bring myself some closure before I end my rebellion against the title, I’d like to be clear on what I have in mind when I use the word Christian. When I say “I’m a Christian,” what I really mean is, “I’m a Christ following, Bible believing, Jesus loving, neighbor serving, spirit lifting, saved, born again, the old is dead, new life bearing, humbled, family leading, children teaching, church going, flawed, sinning, forgiven, dwelling place for the holy spirit, singing, clapping (but not at the same time) praying, servant of the one true King, who is waiting for the return of the Lord, who aims to live for a higher purpose than to serve himself, to do God’s work, to keep his commandments, to live as Jesus lived, and to love as Jesus loved, member of the body of Christ, who is soft hearted, tries to be obedient, cries at Disney cartoons, who fails miserably, but wakes up every day and falls to his knees, thankful that he gets the chance to live for Jesus and fail one more day, thank you God, my life is Yours, Christian.” There. Yes, I’m a Christian.

Well folks, I’m going to get back to singing to my fish. So long, good night, God bless. Thanks for reading.

my practice audience.

my practice audience.


One thought on “A Little Reflection, A Little Rebellion

  1. It is bittersweet to say “goodbye” to your ability to have a baby. It is much different for women. You are right about now shaping your family. We are in a nice place now. Our boys are pretty self-sufficient. We get to go places and have experiences together now. Your family is beautiful and you are a great leader for them. As always, God has placed you in exactly the right place at the right time.

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